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Old 04-01-2008, 07:49 AM   #1
MONSTAFACE
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Default Man rules

An e-mail i got today


he Man Rules*******************
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down



We always hear 'the rules' From the female side, Now here are the rules from the male side



These are our rules!

Please note... they are all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE!






1. Men are NOT mind readers.


1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.


1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.


1. Crying is blackmail.


1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one! Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!


1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.


1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.


1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.


1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.


1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.


1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.


1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have NO idea what mauve is.


1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.


1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.



1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.


1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really!


1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or golf.


1. You have enough clothes.


1. You have too many shoes.


1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!


1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

MONSTAFACE's Sig:OH SHIT!!!! ITS THE COPS!!!!

You clearly don't know shit about fuck - KANE

You're not some sort of mystical creature that is immune to a training effect- KANE

I wish there was an entity that represented the term "injury" if it was, i would find it and beat the living shit out of it!!!!!

yes......i just type and press enter, i dont proofread i did enough of that in college. you know what i meant when i typed it anyway
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Old 04-01-2008, 08:02 AM   #2
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Right on
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Old 04-01-2008, 08:45 AM   #3
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Now that is some good stuff
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Old 04-01-2008, 12:14 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MONSTAFACE
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle..
This goes great with the other one Joker put up.
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Old 04-01-2008, 07:47 PM   #5
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^^^^ yep.

It is very refreshing to read a list from the guy's perspective. They are few and far in between.
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