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Originally Posted by PsychoJES
Just to qualify….I’m 32.
This is a total defense mechanism on his part. When I was many years younger, I had a dated a girl for almost five years. Neither of us could stand each other when we broke up, but, she broke up with me. I, unfortunately, did the same thing your ex did. I couldn’t keep my mouth shut about things. Anything that I thought would make her look like trash, I kept saying. Looking back, I’m totally embarrassed and wish I had done things differently.
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I can only hope he'll end up realizing how he's been acting.
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The best thing for your ex is for him to find someone new, and quickly. It’s amazing how things will change. If he falls in love, he’ll keep his mouth shut. If he’s not, he’ll still keep his mouth because he probably doesn’t want to be alone.
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That's a HUGE thing with him. He so afraid of being alone. At times it seemed as though he only wanted me around just to HAVE someone there. And I told him that.
If he found someone new soon, that'd be the absolute BEST thing for him. And for me. Get him off my back.
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Fortunately for you, most of the people he’s yapping to can see through his barrage of insults and won’t give him a second thought.
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Luckily, the people he's been lying to are people that I could really care less about. They're people that have had a jaded opinion of me anyway, so they're eating it up.
The people that are close to me that he's conacted with things about how he 'still loves me' and 'doesn't know what happened' and all that, know the real story. Like my mom. I still can't believe he contacted her trying to get some pity from her. She pretty much told him she wasn't buying it. So now he's bashing her to those unsavory people. It's sad.
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Offer to get back together with him and he will probably stop as well. It’s all just a male ego thing.
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There's NO way I'm going to make him think he has a shot at fixing things
