Thread: Asking Advice
View Single Post
 
Old 10-18-2008, 11:41 AM
EricT EricT is offline
Rank: Heavyweight
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 6,314
Default

There are many reasons I bother and there are many reasons why sometimes it is like banging my head against a wall.

The thing is I usually always have a "why" and I am willing to defend and back up my advice in depth if called upon to do so. To me that is the responsible thing to do. I am not into this "authority by guru" thing where it is true because BigBob says it even though BigBob can't explain it except to say "this is what I do so you should too".


The thing is many people ask for "explanations" not because they just want to know the reasons but because they have already made up their mind that you are full of shit and the question is not a question but a "challenge". Hell, I've even fallen into that temptation myself when annoyed by some really goofy shit.

So am I supposed to read something more into every question or should I abstain from doing that in order to help those who really do want help? To assume whould make me an asshole. But sometimes giving so much makes me a sucker.

There are certain people, abrasive, where you KNOW they are not really asking but challenging. It is easy to tell because if you say something to that effect they will get really pissed off and defensive. Here's a hint..if they are not guilty of something, most people won't fly into a rage about it!

But there are certain people who will simply leach you. They will continually ask you to explain every thing you say and never come out and clearly tell you if they comprehend or believe in what you are saying..but intstead will just continue to leach you but never ultimately use the info. To me that is quite disrespectful of someone's time and effort.

Most of the time it is 'guru A' says this and you are saying that. Why do you differ? And what they are really saying is "i have more faith in guru A than you but I am humoring you". Well my request is to Man UP and say so and not make me write pages of explanation. Especially since most of the time I provide more explanation than your damned guru!

Many times the stuff I post is of a "teach a man to fish" variety and that is really not so taxing. Some people get something from it and some don't. Many times the specific advice I give someone is used by others even though the OP ignores it. I know becasue they will mention it. And I appreciate that..when someone takes the time to give you some feedback.

There is nothing more irritating to me than someone benefitting from my advice but not having the courtesy to give me some feedback on their experience. We do not operate in a vacumn. Seeing how your advice works out for people, or doesn't, is one of the ways in which you learn.

But you have two types of people. The "scarcity" mentality and the "abundance" mentality. The scarcity people, if you possess a lot of knowledge and are successful in what you do..then to them, you are taking from them. Taking a little piece of their pie. They figure there is only so much to go around and you are diminishing them by your efforts.

But the gems are the abundance people. They figure there is plenty to go around and when you help them you are not taking a piece of their pie or giving them a piece of yours. You are giving them the ingredients to make a pie. And they happily and faithfully pass on those recipes based on their success. Those are the people who keep me bothering.
__________________

To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.



To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
or
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


If you act sanctimonious I will just list out your logical fallacies until you get pissed off and spew blasphemous remarks.
Reply With Quote