Don't be so hard on yourself. You made the right choice by getting back into a routine. Good luck. See ya on the other side. 
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"Success in anything seems to be connected with action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes but don't quit. They hang on after others have let go".
"For me life is continuously being hungry. The meaning of life is not simply to exist, to survive, but to move ahead, to go up, to achieve, to conquer." - Arnold Schwarzenegger
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