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Proof That The World Is Nuts



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  #1  
Old 08-20-2006, 09:46 AM
Darkhorse Darkhorse is offline
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Default Proof That The World Is Nuts

Funny email my friend sent me...I doubt some of these are true, but it IS possible with where they come from..

Subject: Proof That The World Is Nuts


These are all smilers, be they true or false,
I don't know and don't care as I feel like
smiling today.

In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have
sex with animals, but the animals must be
female. Having sexual relations with a male
animal is punishable by death.

(Like THAT makes sense.)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine
a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking
directly at them during the examination. He may
only see their reflection in a mirror.

(Do they look different reversed?)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Muslims are banned from looking at the
genitals of a corpse. This also applies to
undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased
must be covered with a brick or piece of wood
at all times.

(A brick?)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia
is decapitation.

(Much worse than "going blind!")
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

There are men in Guam whose full-time job
is to travel the countryside and deflower young
virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having
sex for the first time.

Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly
forbidden for virgins to marry.

(Let's just think for a minute; is there
Any job anywhere else in the world that even
comes close to this?)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally
allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may
only do so with her bare hands. The husband's
illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed
in any manner desired.

(Ah! Justice!)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool,
England - but only in tropical fish stores.

(of course!)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex
with her husband, and the first time this happens,
her mother must be in the room to witness the act.

(Makes one shudder at the thought.)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a
man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at
the same time.

(I presume this was a big enough problem that
they had to pass a law?)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from
vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics
may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in
places where alcoholic beverages are sold for
consumption on the premises."

(Is this a great country or what? Well, not as
great as Guam!)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Banging your head against a wall uses 150
calories an hour.

(Who volunteers for this stuff?)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Humans and dolphins are the only species that
have sex for pleasure.

(Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can
pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over
on its right side when intoxicated.


(Did the government pay for this research??)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Butterflies taste with their feet.

(Ah, geez.)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

(I know some people like that.)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Starfish don't have brains.

(I know some people like that, too.)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

And, the best for last?

Turtles can breathe through their butts.

(And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)
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  #2  
Old 08-20-2006, 07:31 PM
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Dr X Dr X is offline
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I want the deflower job
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  #3  
Old 08-23-2006, 10:24 AM
EricT EricT is offline
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Default

Quote:
In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from
vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics
may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in
places where alcoholic beverages are sold for
consumption on the premises."
That one may be true. A lot of the clubs I used to play with my band had condom machines in the restrooms but I've never seen them anywhere else. I think they may have the machines in porn stores but I wouldn't know...
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If you act sanctimonious I will just list out your logical fallacies until you get pissed off and spew blasphemous remarks.
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