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I know some people have a problem with one arm being too big but just picture one huge side of my neck , and nothing on the other, it looks absolutely rediculous. In my job (farming) i have to use controls that are about a foot above my head so my traps on my right are too big. Using my left hand is not an option. how can i even them out.

I've been trying upright rows but i only ever seem to feel it in my right side, i think my right does all the work.

Use dumbbells and only work the left trap

yup..

It's your job that probably grew the one side. I would not just work one side, just do heavy shrugs and they will even out.

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